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Out of her league - All Woman - Jamaica Observer
All Woman

Out of her league

IT is often said that you are what you attract, and almost every Jamaican woman has questioned the validity of this statement at least once, based on the kind of man that approaches her. Sometimes after seeing what our prospects are, we have to go home, take a long look at ourselves in the mirror and ask, “Why would he possibly think he stood a chance with me? Is that what I really attract?”

But, it is also often said that opposites attract, and some women will tell you how little they had in common with someone who ended up complementing them in ways they never knew were possible.

These women share:

Antoinette, 32, hairdresser:

Sometimes I wonder if there is a sign on my forehead saying 'married men welcome'. It's always them who pursue me, and for a long time I wondered if it was because of my body. I'm very curvy and I look young, and I just cannot hide my figure. I felt bad for a long time because it seemed like men only saw me as side-chick material, so only the married ones looking to cheat would seriously chase me. Ewww.

Shantol, 26, customer care rep:

I had to stop taking coaster buses from Spanish Town because this conductor take a piece a set on me from the first time I took his bus! From the bus started loading he would be at the window telling me how much he liked me, and the entire journey he would be there in my face begging for a chance to get to know me. It truly was embarrassing. After that it's like he told the other conductors that I was his girl or something and they would always 'loud me up'. I had to start avoiding the gas station where the buses load and just take taxis to work. I don't know how fi him chest so high. Bus fare can't take care of me.

Abi, 29, accountant:

My friend was dating this guy and he had a best friend who was very short with a really bad lisp, who was just generally socially awkward. I don't know if they thought it was funny or something to try to set us up, but they tricked me into spending some time alone with him one night. Of course, I just kept blowing him off like I always did at first, but then he said, “Ok, I can tell you're not into me. I'm truly not that into you either. I won't say anything else to you until they get back, but we can go get some KFC if you're hungry.” That was the start of our friendship that eventually blossomed into a great relationship.

Shanakay, 31, teacher:

A man who worked on the rubbish truck that runs in my area had a thing for me. I would always bring water out for the workers, because I respect their work. Then, when this one started putting certain little arguments to me, I told him immediately that I was not interested. Everything went downhill after that. All of a sudden he started gaslighting me and saying I was scorning the man who is cleaning up my mess and I think I am better than him, and if it was a Benz that he pulled up in at my gate I would give him my number.

Sue, 36, stay-at-home mom:

I would always buy my produce from this young man in the market because he was very polite, and when I became a regular customer, he would basically pack my bag for me without me having to tell him what I wanted. Then I noticed he started giving me extra food, and one day he asked if he could get a chance to get to know me better. I wasn't interested, not because of what he did, but because he seemed way too young for me. I told him as much. He seemed to take it well, but the next week he didn't give me any extra crops at all!



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